Author: Bruce Shark

Kittehs for kittehs.

Rice babehs.

For cuddle fronds.

Name mah alarm?

O.k.

Look.

There she is, the little asshole.

Momma cat runs every time she sees me.

Yea, your babehs are FINE.

I got this, you dirty pirate hooker cat… J/k, sorta.

So, babehs just ate at 1:30 a.m., and I did it alone because everyone else needs the sleep more than I do, since I work from home and can take a nap if needed.

So, in case anyone else does the fostering kittens thing, here are some useful pro tips:

1.) Don’t use the powdered milk replacer….use the canned liquid gud stuff. Powder makes them constipated.

Not fun.

2.) If kittens git constipated, a few drops of olive, canola, or mineral oil. This is a proper part Italian home, I used olive oil.

3.) Stored up kitten poop will result in a poo storm at 1:30 a.m…POO STORM FROM HELL.

4.) A tablet leaning outside of box on “purring mama cat loop” makes kittens happy…also, a gud white noise thing to help caretaker sleep on smaller sharkling’s bed as said caretaker has taken over his room with seven little kittens while sharkling sleeps on sofa.

5.) Trim nails and keep hands/fins clean and warm when handling/bottle feeding kittens. Kittens should be warm and awake when you feed them.

6.) Feed little furry bastards at a 45° angle, so they don’t aspirate formula.

7.) Burp them and stroke them with toothbrush.

8.) Help them pee and poop with soft cotton ball dipped in warm water and squooozed out.

9.) Talk to and sing to and puur to babeh kittens because you are sleep deprived and you are delirious and don’t know how else to make them shhhhhhhhh and go the fuck to sleep.

Hope this was of use.

Video of Arden, post eating….

Eyes are open.

Here is the chubbiest one….Arden… gluttony​.

Babehs fall asleep after full milk tummies.

Awww….

Sleepin’ kittehs.

This feeding/helping pee and poo/cleaning, burping, and petting with a toothbrush takes approximately 45 minutes for all seven, and both sister shark and mahself.

We have this down to an assembly line of kitteh maintenance.

This is Ira.

Ira is a little piggie.

He is super aggressive when he latches on, but then he goes right into The Dude Abides mode.

Extremely strong, one of the heartiest kittehs.