Author: Bruce Shark

IMMA SHARK Swim fast, Aspergers/ADD/ and sorta a goofy a little bit Spock-ish Daffy Duck type. I build/make/fix things.

I’m mystified….

by Bruce Shark, posted in Bruce Shark

I’m mystified….

At a friend’s house watching LiveP.D. and this dude…

They asked him : “Sir do you have any condition or have you ingested anything that would cause a speech impediment?”

Dude: “No…..other than drinking, no…”

I would make the worst cop EVER.

EVER.

This show is a car wreck of humanity.

SOOOO.

by Bruce Shark, posted in Bruce Shark

SOOOO…. I snuck back into mah local Target (they haven’t caught me yet) and there is this guy and his wife, nice looking couple, sorta confoosed by the narwhal….

So I saw he had his phone in his hand and I said :

“Hey… Narwhal Song…look it up…and I’m sorry ahead of time, because you will never forget the time a shark in Target told you to know the Narwhal Song…”

I swim away, silently, and hear :

The Narwhal Song blasting from the seasonal section of Target…and his wife laughing.

You are

Remember the weird gazebo porta-potty and how we decorated it with fake flowers for two different seasons?

by Bruce Shark, posted in Bruce Shark

Remember the weird gazebo porta-potty and how we decorated it with fake flowers for two different seasons?

These neighbors never figured out it was me and they left the flowers up…

But alas, the work is done on their home and yard, and we noticed the gazebo porta-potty was removed.

We were so sad we made a grave marker and placed it in the area where it stood.

R.I.P.